For more than fifty decades, you have pulled me to the ground, now you are bent on swallowing me up. I don’t know how I would get through the test, or push through the pain. Everything in my life has happened by surprise, I can never win at anything. Nothing is stepping in, but all seem to be stepping out. There seems to be no way out of this fog of horror, and out of every selfless misdeed I have fallen into.
My name has been called out from the book of wrench and the angel of death has ticked me present. Nothing can covert this. This is me, a result of random mating, grown into a multipurpose misconduct with an irredeemable path.
For more than one year now, I have lived with atherosclerosis. It is a disease that narrows and / or blocks the blood vessels that supplies the heart. “You have 6 months to live”, the doctor said. He said it in the most casual way; it felt announcing death was his forte.
My brain went into instant hemorrhage; all he said after the announcement felt like it was coming from a million miles away. I stood up and walked din-dazed out of his office.
How sweet would it sound if I tell you I am a farce of existence? A galloping lonely grave, unsure of my sojourn, yet, repeatedly asking, what is my worth?
My wife came home that night and met me in a smoky room. I told my wife, what the doctor said. I told her my life had changed and I don’t know what to do about it.
She said smoking was not the solution and smoking is a bit dangerous. Well, since smokers are liable to die young, I could as well kick death in the butt; after all I’ll pay him a visit soon.
The next day came by, and she packed her bags.
Live well! She emphasized, as she walked out through the front door.
Thus, this is me, writing my first page from top to bottom because I know I am heading home. More than fifty thousand writers flood the surface of this earth. Some will make it to stardom, some will actually get really close. Others like me, will just be the misfit that will write and play the background till an unseen evolution whirls us into darkness.
After three decades, eight cities, seven homes, three failed marriages. With a dog calling out, a light of hope, no helmet, and a broken barren spirit, I ride towards you. Will I change my mind and obey the ray of hope shining in this dark, I doubt. Till the moment I am with you, and be your acquaintance, keep your fingers crossed.
Some people are used to heading towards doom, they someday decide to chin up and grab the whirlwind like a duvet of comfort.
Hello gravity! My dear gravity! Open up and swallow me.
BY OLUMIDE KUTI