Every morning had a new beautiful smile it brought with it, because with him, love became redefined. From the way we chased each other around the house like kids, to how we cuddled up every night like babies. He loved me effortlessly and I love him endlessly. He was one man who made love so easy, so beautiful and so fascinating. Yet, there seemed to be something missing and that one thing set us apart. He left me despite all and I found myself asking what it truly takes to keep a man you love yours forever. Before we go on, it should be noted that, this is targeted at relationships that have love established. Let’s shoot girls!
The biggest mistake that I have realized many women make is that they believe sex and good food is all they need to keep a man, without understanding that without the right investment; that relationship is close to its retirement. All thanks to the Davido and Chioma saga that has fueled the whole idea of food as the pathway to a lasting relationship. Hey darling, there is someone out there who can offer him a better sex than you can, and there is a superb chef who can make better meals. You know what that means; you must be able to give to him that which he can’t find on a platter of Gold from another woman.
Let’s start with PEACE. Ladies! Enough of men seeing you as dramatic beings, enough of men having to believe there is so much patience needed to handle a woman. Your man should see you as a different person, a heart he can always talk to and a soul he can trust. Make yourself his everyday panacea, a shoulder he can always cry on and a pillar he can always lean on. The truth is, men want to be babies sometimes too, and they expect to get that baby feeling they get from their mothers from their partners too. So, a problem erupts when they get trouble from a heart they expect to get Peace from. However, you can’t give what you don’t have; so if you really want to give your man Peace, you must have peace from your inside. This means, you should focus more on building yourself before you end up with a man.
Be his FRIEND. Many people say; marry your best friend. Oh well, I agree with that; but I also say ; Make you man your best friend and get married to him. I get really amused when I see people who are in serious relationships; say they have a best friend somewhere else. No doubt, you will have really close friends but having a partner is beyond professing love. It extends to sharing joys and pains, thoughts and emotions etc, because there is a special bond it creates between the duo. Everyman wants a woman he can talk to, laugh with, and cry with. When someone is your best friend, you are not scared of making mistakes because you know there is a heart to scold yet forgive you and it is safer when your man feels that way about you. Don’t bore your relationship with stereotypes, but be all shades of amazing with him. Be his gist partner, business partner, lover, partner in crime and every other thing that you can be in that relationship.
In addition to all of these, have a sound judgment. Be so true to your man that he can trust you with important things and decision making. Understand him in as much as you want him to understand you. Be selfless yet real to your relationship. You don’t have to spoon-feed him but feed him daily with words of wisdom and your prayers (if you believe in it). Importantly, have a positive attitude and mindset towards the relationship and be prepared to be independent yet submissive.
You will agree with me that none of these above can be bought with money, and that is the kind of investment that is crucial to put into your relationship. However, other things like being a good cook, tickling his fancy etc are also important to keep your relationship interesting.
In all of these, you need to also understand that you cannot force a man to be with you. Thus, regardless of how much of these things you invest, a man who is yours will stay, and a man who isn’t will go. Just always make sure that you sow a seed difficult to uproot by another.